confidence

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I got an email from my boss yesterday. A forward really. From an author. A response to the manuscript critique I did recently (remember the one that was late because Robert and I were kickin it at Applebees?).

The author was asking for a new deadline. So he could revise the manuscript. "I'd like to go through it again and take all of these critiques into account." 

This is an editor's dream response! And a complete surprise.

Typically writers (I am one, so I can say this) think they are perfect. They have reasons and justifications for everything an editor suggests might be changed. And you can't blame them. After all, I spent 15 hours editing something he spent his whole life writing (through experience, study, dreaming, writing and rewriting). So for him to receive the feedback so willingly was like being handed the winning lottery ticket of editing. 

But more than that. I was simply shocked. That he could be helped. By me. 

***

Shortly after receiving this email I read Ann Voskamp's latest blog post, in which she talks about getting up at 4:30 in the morning to make her son apple crumble. Because she lost a bet. 

Her son told her a man had gone to great lengths to come to church to meet her because he'd read her book and found grace.

Ann didn't believe her son. Why would anyone come to church to meet her? And so her son bet her an early morning apple crumble. And she lost. Because a man really did come all that way. To meet her. The woman who wrote the book that helped him find grace.

***

These two experiences together--Ann's and mine--made me realize that it is okay to be confident in what you are good at. And by confidence I don't just mean knowing you are good at it, but also believing that others will know and recognize and be helped by your gifts.

It's not conceited to believe I can offer constructive feedback to a published author to help him improve upon an already great manuscript. It's not prideful to think someone would go out of their way on a Sunday morning to see you and thank you for helping them see God more clearly. It's simply receiving and being a good steward of the gifts God has given you.

EMBRACE CONFIDENCE.

Am I the only one who struggles with balancing humility and pride, confidence and conceit, trying to be a good steward of gifts and talents yet continually amazed when you really do make a difference?


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