Relationships Are Tricky

One of the most important things to be intentional about is relationships.

Randy and I are especially feeling this right now as our moving day gets closer and closer. Who do we need to see before we cross the border, not knowing when we'll be back? Who do we want to see? How do we manage to see everyone in such a short window of time?


First on our list was Matthew, Jennifer, and Riley, my brother and sister-in-law and niece in Texas. We were able to spend a week with them, and thanks to our frequent flyer miles only had to spend $25 to get there.

The week was perfect! From the beach to the brewery, the mall to the merry-go-round, football games and delicious food, we made the most of our time together. Riley, at age 4, opened our eyes to the fun we have in store for us in Mexico. Just look at these beautiful centerpieces she created for our dinners each night!


One of the most special times for me was the afternoon Jennifer and I spent together. It reminded me how much I need, and how much I've missed, having a close friend nearby. We talked about how challenging and how painful it can be when you invest your time and emotional energy in someone who doesn't reciprocate. Several of the people I have reached out to, wanting to connect before moving to Mexico, haven't seemed all that interested in spending time with me. As we plan our going away party here in California I realize I don't have any close friends that are just mine to invite. And just as hard is planning a party in Ohio and discovering that the people I most want to be there can't make the time to come. Jennifer totally understands where I'm coming from, and it made me feel better just knowing that someone else gets what I'm going through.


It also challenged me to ask: have I been intentional about nurturing these relationships? Or is the reason people don't have time for me now because I haven't had time for them in the past?

Randy, too, is feeling the weight of this. As we invite people to our California party several have responded with: "where have you been the past two years?" The truth is, we've intentionally invested so much time in creating a healthy marriage that we've let nearly all of our other relationships fall by the wayside. And while we don't regret a moment that we've spent together, we have to acknowledge that by not being intentional about finding a balance between investing in our marriage and investing in others, some have felt abandoned by us.


Relationships are tricky. And sometimes painful. But even with the heartache, I believe they are worth it. So ask yourself: if I were to have a going away party, who would I want to come? And start intentionally investing in those relationships today.

Next stop... Ohio!


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