Mother's Day

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As Mother's Day quickly approaches (Wednesday here in Baja; Sunday in the United States), my social media feeds are filling up with tributes to moms, memes about moms, gushy sentimentality about moms. But one Instagram post in particular jumped out at me this morning. It said:
"No one can be a better mom to your children than you."
This one stood out to me because it's not the world I live in. The world I live in is one where moms are controlled by addictions and abusive husbands and have been rendered incapable of being the best caregiver for their children.

Some of our children were found living on the streets, ten-year-olds caring for four-year-olds, with fetal alcohol syndrome, severe handicaps, sleeping in cars, dirty, bruised, burned, afraid, scared and scarred.

Three months ago four siblings were brought to us. They had their first visit with their mother on Friday. After accepting new children, we have a three-month waiting period before they are allowed visits. This gives the kids time to adjust and the parents time to seek help.

I didn't think I would ever be open to this particular mom visiting. Maybe because all the other kids I care for were already living here when Randy and I moved six months ago. But I saw the condition of these kids on arrival. And I've seen them flourish in a loving environment.

But when this mom saw her kids for the first time in three months she burst into tears. The kids burst into tears as they ran into their mother's arms. And I had to walk away for a moment to wipe my own tears away, as the kids started telling her all about their new lives:
"Mom, I turned 10!"
"Look at my dress!"
"My backpack has flames on it!"
"When we are bad we have to eat lentils, with NO SALT!"
Visitation is once a week for thirty minutes. During their thirty-minute visit, her kids called me "Mama Katie" several times. My heart went out to her. How must it feel to hear your kids call someone else "Mama." To have to share your children with another. But as the visit came to an end, she took my hand, looked me in the eye, and thanked me for taking such good care of her children.

Maybe she is the best mom her kids could have after all. Not because of the mom she was three months ago, but because of the mom she was on Friday, because of the mom she has the potential to be next Friday and the Friday after that, even if just for thirty minutes.


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